Fic: Herd me, Shepherd

Herd me, Shepherd.
Author: dodo31
Rating: G? PG? PG. I say "damn" once.
Spoiler/Setting: Set just after Jaynestown. Spoilers for that episode.
Words: 296
Disclaimer: Belonging to Joss Whedon, et al. I don't aim to make any money off this.
Summary: Jayne doesn't know who he is.


Thinking back a couple of deals, a couple of planets ago. The sweltering heat. Sweat running down his face like the ink from that fancy calligraphy he never quite learned how to do. Big, fancy belt buckle. Cows getting to where they need to go and kneeling at his feet, waiting for the next switch of the rope. Jayne Cobb liked being a cowboy. And sometimes, he wonders if he'd like being a Shepherd.

Sure, he's not a man of God. Sure, he barely believes in God. But it'd be something. He could make a difference. Not be a false hero like he was to the people in the mudder's village. He could be a real hero. Live the life of one. Influence lives and all that.

Jayne kept thinking about it as he cleaned off his knife. He wasn't a hero. The people in that barren place... they needed a hero real bad. So they took him as one instead. But that poor soul... the boy who was killed. He was the hero. And Jayne isn't allowed to feel like this. He isn't allowed to feel at all. Or he shouldn't. He almost needs to be numb. But instead...

It won't come off. The blood. Stained on there good. His fingers throbbing. A layer skin is gone instead, revealing the pale, soft, pink layer below. A boy sacrificed his own life to keep Jayne alive. And then Jayne killed the man who killed him. And that doesn't justify a damn thing because Jayne's not a man of God. Not a knight in shining armor. Just a mercenary who made a mistake but really wants to be a hero.

Maybe he's gonna go talk to the Shepherd after all. See what he can do about all that wantin'.

Note: Originally done with the thought of not posting and including as many improv challenges at once in a fic less than 300 words that still made sense. I found it earlier, though, and thought it might be nice to let someone else get a look at. Words are as follows:

improv words used (or derivatives thereof. -ed, -ing, etc may have been added):

swelter -- ink -- belt -- kneel
numb -- real -- stain -- throb
barren -- pale -- justify -- live
knight -- soul -- allowed -- need

x-posted dodo31 and ff_fanfic